Story by "David"
I am a 20 year old male student. I am sure my DP has arisen from the use of the drug ecstasy. I have had various other symptoms since the night I took the "E", but the DP is the worst and has persisted the most.
About 5 months ago, I took one ecstasy tablet with some friends. I had no adverse reaction that night, apart from insomnia. The next day, I felt pretty wasted, but did not think to much of it. This 'wasted' feeling persisted for the next few days, and then I developed chronic insomnia. I felt terrible, and saw my doctor and told him everything. He said the feelings would pass. The next week was hell- terrible depression, sleeplessness, lack of appetite, depersonalization, lack of confidence, obsessive thinking, anxiety- the works. I could not leave the house let alone work or study. I was put on a fluoxide SSRI by my doc which did nothing. Around a month later, I was put on mirtazapine (an anti-depressant), which helped greatly with sleep, depression etc and I was able to begin working again and studying. The DP kept coming and going and I never got to the stage where I felt normal again however. somewhere over the next few months, the DP stopped coming and going and just stayed. I tried many things to help with the dp- l-glutamine, meditation, exercise l-tryptophan, caffeine, and I even saw an osteopath but these did not help.
I continued on, stopped drinking alcohol for a while, yet the symptoms did not leave. I eventually started seeing a shrink who told me to come of the mirtazapine, which I did over a month or two. My shrink seems to think that relaxation techniques and valium will solve my problem- I am not so sure.
Now, three weeks without any drugs, I feel
depression at times, but dp all the time. I just want to feel normal
again, and am going to push for the celexa-knolopin combo many speak of. I
will continue to 'push on', but my concept of self remains so strange that
I remain very introspective. I long for a cure like all of you!
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