Story of joe
Iím Joe and Iím 28 years old. I have been experiencing DP for the last 15
years. I have read most of the stories on here and can also relate. My
symptoms started in December of í91. I had an extremely bad cold and fever.
I was talking some prescription pills for it. After about a week or so this
"feeling" kicked in. I felt like I had fallen asleep and never woke up. The
voices, people and surroundings were all alien to me. Itís like nothing made
sense. This experience felt like a passing thought. My senses were numb.
Itís like you see life as a big confusing clump of matter. These symptoms
lasted 7-8 days and I would regain my "reality" again. After the symptom
subsided, Iíd go back and track what I did during the week and find out that
it really happened. Another thing I can trace is that I slept a lot during
the symptoms. You feel this sense of fear and anxiety-not knowing if you
will ever feel like yourself again. Consciously, I tell myself that itís
real and that itís only an episode.
Then it happened again after a month- the same feeling taking control of my
mind. You are trying to explain yourself to people and all they can do is
look at you with this expression that youíre crazy. These symptoms have come
and gone constantly throughout the years.
Over the years I have been treated with several prescription drugs such as
paxil, clonazepam, fluoxetine, and a few others. Though, they have worked
and I have not had a major symptom since 2000. Every person that Iíve talk
to about it canít believe me. My family doctor at first compared this
feeling to Psychosis.
Other doctors have linked depression, panic and fear to this symptom. But,
it's only when Iím in this state that I feel depressed and fearful.
I have been off medication for 5 years now and coping. I feel as if the
symptoms have left an effect aside from the total feeling. I remain feeling
somewhat distant from myself and it's like I "donít get the whole picture",
if that makes any sense; almost like I see reality as a passing thought
(sort of what Iím experiencing typing this). I've learned to tolerate it
since there is no option. I keep myself busy and focus on tasks to mask the
feeling. I know I will never be able to enjoy life as I should. I would
really like to hear other people's views and converse with them with their
own experiences. If anyone wants to contact me, feel free: firstname.lastname@example.org