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IsItReallyMe
Posts: 2
Joined: Tue Oct 08, 2019 1:09 pm

Hello

Post by IsItReallyMe » Tue Oct 08, 2019 1:41 pm

I'm not really sure what to say other than 'hey there'. I'm heading to work in a bit, so don't be surprised if I don't reply or post again right away.
Admins, my apologies for anything that shouldn't be here...
I am 49 years old, married, female, with three grown kids, and grandkids I don't get to see often enough. For most of my life, I have felt disconnected from my body and my loved ones. PsychCentral has a list of 6 signs of depersonalization, that really hit home for me. ['6 Warning Signs You Suffer from Depersonalization Disorder' by Christine Schoenwald, originally posted on Tango.] I've felt that way for most of my life. I don't know that feeling this way causes me anxiety, but I do know that feeling 'too connected' for too long can cause me breakdowns. Not sure if that makes sense to anyone. I am currently undiagnosed, and trying to work up the courage to find a therapist. I am under a doc's care (GP/Family doc, not Psychiatrist) for depression and anxiety for a bout a year now, and just starting to get a handle on my anxiety. I don't know about anyone else (esp. females) but I don't like to spend a lot of time on how I look, because it is still very disconcerting to me to not feel any connection to who I see in the mirror. Taking care of my body just seems to bring that sensation out more. I try to walk ten minutes every morning, and I try mindfulness - ie, being aware of my surroundings and my body - but it is monumentally difficult. My record for being able to do that is only about 2-3 minutes, then I get lost in my head again.
I'd better get going now. Wish me luck having the guts to find a therapist again - my last one went on 'indefinite leave', and that was a couple years ago. I hate going through that process...
'We set out to save the Shire, Sam, and it has been saved - but not for me.' - Frodo Baggins, The Return of the King

joseph
Posts: 7
Joined: Wed Aug 21, 2019 5:00 am

Re: Hello

Post by joseph » Wed Oct 09, 2019 7:52 pm

IsItReallyMe wrote:
Tue Oct 08, 2019 1:41 pm
I'm not really sure what to say other than 'hey there'. I'm heading to work in a bit, so don't be surprised if I don't reply or post again right away.
Admins, my apologies for anything that shouldn't be here...
I am 49 years old, married, female, with three grown kids, and grandkids I don't get to see often enough. For most of my life, I have felt disconnected from my body and my loved ones. PsychCentral has a list of 6 signs of depersonalization, that really hit home for me. ['6 Warning Signs You Suffer from Depersonalization Disorder' by Christine Schoenwald, originally posted on Tango.] I've felt that way for most of my life. I don't know that feeling this way causes me anxiety, but I do know that feeling 'too connected' for too long can cause me breakdowns. Not sure if that makes sense to anyone. I am currently undiagnosed, and trying to work up the courage to find a therapist. I am under a doc's care (GP/Family doc, not Psychiatrist) for depression and anxiety for a bout a year now, and just starting to get a handle on my anxiety. I don't know about anyone else (esp. females) but I don't like to spend a lot of time on how I look, because it is still very disconcerting to me to not feel any connection to who I see in the mirror. Taking care of my body just seems to bring that sensation out more. I try to walk ten minutes every morning, and I try mindfulness - ie, being aware of my surroundings and my body - but it is monumentally difficult. My record for being able to do that is only about 2-3 minutes, then I get lost in my head again.
I'd better get going now. Wish me luck having the guts to find a therapist again - my last one went on 'indefinite leave', and that was a couple years ago. I hate going through that process...
Hello,

Welcome to the boards!
Reading your story, I would say you're definitely in the right place, I think finding a therapist is really a great way to go but make sure you find one which understands and is trained in dissociative disorders, I personally made the mistake of choosing any therapists and they aren't all as helpful as the others.

Fortunately, there are databases where you are able to find therapists who specialize specifically in this field.

Here's a link- https://isstd.connectedcommunity.org/ne ... ofessional

Good luck to you and welcome again!

IsItReallyMe
Posts: 2
Joined: Tue Oct 08, 2019 1:09 pm

Re: Hello

Post by IsItReallyMe » Fri Oct 11, 2019 6:39 pm

Great, thanks for the link! That will definitely help some... I'm in the midwest, so I"m not holding out much hope about available resources.
'We set out to save the Shire, Sam, and it has been saved - but not for me.' - Frodo Baggins, The Return of the King

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