Self No-Self  Depersonalization?  What's that?  I'm now 40 and have been in the helping profession since my early 20's.  I've read every diagnostic code there is and just now came to realize that depersonalization has always been the underlying issue in my life.  I cannot remember a time in my life where this diagnosis did not apply.  I don't have a first episode to point to.  …
I have not been clinically diagnosed with anything, which may at this point invalidate my claim, but I know I've got the "something" those of us with this condition experience. Corresponding with accounts I've read from others, some of us develop this identity (ha) after we come to perceive the human existence as one devoid of divine matter and constructed simply of mechanistic elements which have …
If I can stop the tears I'll be able to get through this! I was unaware of the condition DP until my midwife referred me to a psychiatrist thinking I was suffering from ante-natal depression. I sat in her office answering a string of questions, that for the first time in my life I answered truthfully. She seemed almost overjoyed at her diagnosis (almost like she …
Finding this website has been a huge relief for me. For the longest time now I was convinced that I may have a brain tumor or something; perhaps not. I have been seeing a psychiatrist for some time.  She prescribed me Zoloft which I have been on for a little over a year. It has helped with my depression, but not with these rather startling …
Thank you so much for this site. I cannot stress how helpful this forum is for those of us who suffer from this disorder. I have had DP for 16 years and when it 'peaks', it is just awful to deal with.I developed Depersonalization from smoking Marijuana when I was 15. I had smoked it many times, but after smoking …
The fan blowing on my feet is the only comfort I can feel at this moment. The flannel sheets are soft on my skin, my pillow is tucked under me in just the right places, but I still can't feel completely at ease.I can stare at the closet door all night long wondering why I feel like this, but that damn door isn't answering back. …
I have suffered from DP all of my life. When I was a child I would just space out and see all of these lights and colors. I never liked being around other children because they seemed far too connected to their physical form and physical movements than I was. I enjoyed sitting by myself in my room perfectly still for hours. I …
I am so glad that I found this site. I had been reading some of the experiences and some of them are carbon copy descriptions of what I have been living with.I remember my first experience as a child. I was about 10 or 11, I was sitting up in my bunk bed looking towards my encyclopedias when all of a sudden this feeling comes …
For years I have attempted to recount my experience with depersonalization as a full-time condition.  And every time I've tried, I've stopped, for the simple reason that I first knew this illness nearly 30 years ago, and to relay everything I've experienced, felt and learned in that time would literally take hundreds of pages.  But now, having explored the condition intensely for several years, I …
Where to begin my story of DP which has spanned roughly 35 yrs. I'm 42 and I believe my first episode occurred when I was pre-teen. I remember it vividly.  Sitting around with my family playing SORRY in what I recall as a very ordinary night. Suddenly a wave of "unrealness" swept over me and I recall leaving the game in a panic.  At that …
Hi I just recently found this website and to say the least I am fascinated.  I have spent the greater portion of the last 2 years of my life, examining, reading, studying, analyzing, and gathering information as to why I feel the way I do or don't in the case. It has given me tremendous relieve to read this web page. Although extraordinarily scary at first, …
Hi, my name is Alex, I’m 28 and this is my experience with DP. About 18 months ago while at work something changed inside my brain. It was instantaneous, I looked around and everything seemed different, like nothing was real, like I was in a dream or a movie or under the influence of drugs, an unbelievably hot rush of fear swept through my body …

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